Therapy Is Almost Like Being in Love
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When I first learned the advantage of summarizing a client’s story or a therapy incident in a one-line synopsis, massaged to emphasize the connection to the therapy’s focus, I realized that I needed practice. So after every TV episode, commercial, or movie I watched, after every news story, novel, or chapter I read, after every story told to me by a friend or family member, I stated my synopsis out loud (silent rehearsal produces retrospective revision–cheating). After thousands of muddled attempts, I got to the point where I could confidently summarize what I had heard or read or seen.
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Prostitution is legalized—at brothels outside of Clark County. I think the self-defense laws are a little more stringent, [and] as a woman I want to be able to protect myself should worst-case scenario things happen.
Therapy Is Almost Like Being in Love
All subissions must be related to Charlotte Sartre. Any content not related to Charlotte Sartre will be removed. My fiancé, Lance Hart, we met in Florida randomly after sending each other cat pictures on Twitter. He moved out to Vegas a couple months after that. I was living in LA, and when the lease was up I just decided to move here with him. LA’s a lot more expensive than Vegas, and I like the laws we have in Nevada better than California.
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If I see a director I might want to shoot for, I can just message them. Another example of bad faith that Sartre gives is that of a young woman on a first date. The young woman's date compliments her on her physical appearance, but she ignores the obvious sexual connotations of his compliment and chooses instead to direct the compliment at herself as a conscious human being. He then takes her hand, but she neither takes it nor rejects it.
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However, to do so is in itself to make a choice, and thereby to acknowledge their freedom as conscious human beings. The 20th century French philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre called it mauvaise foi ('bad faith'), the habit that people have of deceiving themselves into thinking that they do not have the freedom to make choices for fear of the potential consequences of making a choice. What awards have you won in your career so far? This past AVN I won my first [award] for most outrageous sex scene.
If you’re shooting a scene without a condom, somebody could report you to OSHA and you’d have to pay a gigantic fine and it’s a big pain in the ass for something that almost everybody does. In Las Vegas and Nevada, there’s no condom law. Many clients are easy to love, and it’s no surprise that research consistently shows that psychotherapy works best with the people who need it least. How did you come up with the names Goth Charlotte and Charlotte Sartre?
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I had a Tumblr following or a bit, I was blogging about spiders and porn and other stuff I liked, so I had some carryover fanbase from that. I no longer have a Tumblr, because they changed their rules a bunch. By sticking with the safe, easy, default ‘choice' and failing to recognise the multitude of other choices that are available to him, a person places himself at the mercy of the circumstances in which he happens to find himself. Thus, the person is more akin to an object than to a conscious human being, or, in Sartrean terminology, more akin to a ‘being-in-itself' than to a ‘being-for-itself'. [Also,] in LA, for every day of production you need a film permit, which nobody’s getting. You have to sit in a room all day and get a permit, and why would you be sitting in a room when you could be filming?
I love doing taxes, but I don’t really like telling [people] how much they owe. I was living in the Bay Area at that point, and I started looking at different companies I could shoot for. I didn’t have an agent, so I was just bothering anybody I could. I was one of those people who discovered the internet a little too early and got really curious with Googling. I was like, oh my God, you can type in “boobs! ” I was always really queer from a young age, but not knowing there was a word for that.
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We caught up with Sartre inside her Vegas home, where she lives with her fiancé, adult film star Lance Hart, four cats and six tarantulas. Wearing flame-adorned pajama pants and a fluffy gray robe, Sartre discussed everything from how she got her industry start to her upcoming wedding (she and Hart are set to tie the knot on February 16), diversity in porn and more. Get the help you need from a therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today.
Most people watch porn, yet the people making and producing it are largely stigmatized. It’s like, how can you consume something and then turn around and shame the person who made it? I think a lot of it is projection, like the trope of the anti-gay senator or congressman who’s soliciting boys for blow jobs in men’s bathrooms. They want to jerk with one hand and point the finger with the other.
After thousands of further attempts, I got to the where I could spin the synopsis to make a point. I even found that the commitment to synopsizing forced me to pay closer attention. My Twitter had maybe 1,000 followers, and most of them were people I knew from high school. I figured if they didn’t already know I do porn, they’re going to find out anyway, and they’ll either want to still be my friend- [or not]. Most people are still really cool with me. I didn’t want to make a whole new persona.
Instead, she lets her hand rest indifferently in his so as to buy time and delay having to make a choice about accepting or rejecting his advances. Whereas she chooses to treat his compliment as being unrelated to her body, she chooses to treat her hand (which is a part of her body) as an object, thereby acknowledging, or betraying, her freedom to make choices. I’m all self-booking, so I make the arrangements myself, which is a lot easier in my opinion.
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